Friday, July 25, 2003

RIAA Crackdown

Wow, I never thought it would go this far. The subpoenas have been sent to the ISP's. Are you a target of the RIAA. You could be heavily fined if you are still sharing music on your computer. Amazing but true. There's also a list here of user names included in the first batch of subpoenas, if you are using kazaa, you better see if you are on this list (and contact your attorney):

TechTV | RIAA Hit List

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Tuesday, July 22, 2003

Ruh Roh

RIAA suing music sharing users

I for one am sure glad I don't use any file sharing programs.....(click, click, delete). This may be a little extreme but I do suppose it's better than Orren Hatch's proposal of nuking computers found to be sharing files.

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Sunday, July 20, 2003

Good Advise

We get so much bad information in our e-mail boxes everyday that I find it a shock when I get good advise forwarded to me. The funny thing about it is I still felt the necessity to check it out online just to make sure it was true. It is, so I copy this bit of very good advice to you:

Subject: Very good advise from an attorney

A corporate attorney sent the following out to the employees in his company:

* The next time you order checks have only your initials (instead of first name) and last name put on them.

* If someone takes your check book, they will not know if you sign your checks with just your initials or your first name, but your bank will know how you sign your checks.

* When you are writing checks to pay on your credit card accounts, DO NOT put the complete account number on the "For" line. Instead, just put the last four numbers. The credit card company knows the rest of the number and anyone who might be handling your check as it passes through all the check processing channels won't have access to it.

* Put your work phone # on your checks instead of your home phone. If you have a PO Box use that instead of your home one. Never have your SS# printed on your checks (DUH!) you can add it if it is necessary. But, if you have it printed, anyone can get it.

* Place the contents of your wallet on a photocopy machine, do both sides of each license, credit card, etc., You will know what you had in your wallet and all of the account numbers and phone numbers to call and cancel.

* Keep the photocopy in a safe place. I also carry a photocopy of my passport when I travel either here or abroad.

* We've all heard horror stories about fraud that's committed on us in stealing a name, address, Social Security number, credit cards, etc.

Unfortunately I, an attorney, have firsthand knowledge because my wallet was stolen last month. Within a week, the thieve(s) ordered an expensive monthly cell phone package, applied for a VISA credit card, had a credit line approved to buy a Gateway computer, received a PIN number from DMV to change my driving record information online, and more.

*But here's some critical information to limit the damage in case this happens to you or someone you know: We have been told we should cancel our credit cards immediately. But the key is having the toll free numbers and your card numbers handy so you know whom to call. Keep those where you can find them easily.

* File a police report immediately in the jurisdiction where it was stolen, this proves to credit providers you were diligent, and is a first step toward an investigation (if there ever is one).

But here's what is perhaps most important: (I never even thought to do this).

Call the three national credit reporting organizations immediately to place a fraud alert on your name and Social Security number. I had never heard of doing that until advised by a bank that called to tell me an application for credit was made over the Internet in my name.

The alert means any company that checks your credit knows your information was stolen and they have to contact you by phone to authorize new credit.

By the time I was advised to do this, almost two weeks after the theft, all the damage had been done.

There are records of all the credit checks initiated by the thieves' purchases, none of which I knew about before placing the alert. Since then, no additional damage has been done, and the thieves threw my wallet away this weekend. (someone turned it in). It seems to have stopped them in their tracks.

The numbers are:
Equifax: 1-800-525-6285 Experian (formerly TRW): 1-888-397-3742 Trans Union: 1-800-680-7289

Social Security Administration (fraud line): 1-800-269-0271

Tuesday, July 15, 2003

Real Car Insurance Claims

Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.

The other car collided with mine without giving me warning of its intention.

I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my head through it.

I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.

A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve several times before I hit him.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother in law and headed over the embankment.

In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

I had been shopping for a plant all day and was on my way home. As I reached an inter-section a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.

I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.

I was on the way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident and damage my big end.

As I approached the intersection a sign appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.

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Thursday, July 10, 2003

A Woman's Dictionary

1. "Fine"

This is the word women use at the end of any argument when they feel they are right but can't stand to hear you argue any longer. It means that you should shut up. (NEVER use "fine" to describe how she looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.)

2. "Five minutes"

This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so women feel that it's an even trade.

3. "Nothing"

"Nothing" means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine."

4. "Go Ahead" (with raised eyebrows) This is NOT permission; it's a dare! If you mistake it for permission, the result will be the woman will get upset over "Nothing" and you'll have a "five-minute" discussion that will end with the word "Fine."

5. "Go Ahead" (normal eyebrows) this is NOT permission, either. It means, "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care." You will get a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

6. "Loud Sigh"

This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement. Very frequently misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are a complete idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing!."

7. "Soft Sigh"

Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. It means she is momentarily content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe in the hope that the moment will last a bit longer.

8. "Oh"

This word - followed by any statement - is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least two days. ("Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie). Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead," sometimes followed by acts so unspeakable that I can't bring myself to write about them.

9. "That's Okay"

This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding what the penalty will be for whatever you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead." Once she has had time to plan it out, you are in for some mighty big trouble.

10. "Please Do"

This is not a statement, it is an offer. The woman is giving you the chance to come up with an excuse for what you have done. In other words, a chance to get yourself into even more trouble. If you handle this correctly, you shouldn't get a "That's Okay."

11. "Thanks"

The woman is thanking you. Don't faint and don't look for hidden meaning. Just say "you're welcome."

12. "Thanks A Lot"

"Thanks A Lot" is dramatically different from "Thanks." A woman will say "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It is usually followed by the "Loud Sigh." This signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way. Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing".

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Wednesday, July 09, 2003

'Nother Joke-Idiots Abound

IDIOTS AT WORK:
I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the

clerk noticed I had never signed my name on the back of the
credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction
unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was
necessary to compare the signature I had just signed on the receipt. So
I signed the credit card in front of her. She carefully compared
the signature to the one I had just signed on the receipt. As luck
would have it, they matched.

IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:

I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the
local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer
Crossing sign on our road. The reason: too many deer were being hit by
Cars and he didn't want them to cross there anymore.

IDIOT SIGHTING #1:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee
asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'

He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

IDIOT SIGHTING #2:
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who is leaving
the company due to 'downsizing,' our manager commented cheerfully,
'this is fun!. We should do this more often.' Not a word was spoken.
We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights
stare.

IDIOT SIGHTING #3:

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up
our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the
service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock
the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was
unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!'
To which he replied, 'I know - I already got that side.'

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Monday, July 07, 2003

Gentle thoughts for a Monday

1. Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.

2. There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to
look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it
is that wrinkles don't hurt.

3. When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's
dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

4. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

5. Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.

6. A penny saved is a government oversight.

7. The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at
the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the
tempting moment.

8. The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by
then your body and your fat are really good friends.

9. The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy
a replacement.

10. He who hesitates is probably right.

11. If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.

12. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in

mind to blame.

13. The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell
when he's really in trouble.

14. Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS"
together it spells "THEIRS"?

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