Tuesday, January 27, 2004

Inbox Attack

I don't know about anyone else, but my inbox seems to be under attack right now. It's all because of a new virus that is a mass mailer virus. It comes into your inbox and might have one of the following subjects:
  • test
  • hi
  • hello
  • Mail Delivery System
  • Mail Transaction Failed
  • Server Report
  • Status
  • Error
It also contains an attachment, usually one like body.pif or test.pif.

My mother-in-law is one of the unlucky ones who is infected by this worm that once it infects you, sends out emails randomly to people in your address book. But, the little bugger is smart to. It looks for addresses that contain words like admin or webmaster and skips over those. We wouldn't want it infected anyone who might recognize the mail message as a virus now would we?

Anyway, if you receive this e-mail, even if it is from a friend, especially if it comes from a friend, do not even open it. DELETE IT. Once it is deleted, empty your deleted items just to make sure it's gone. Also, to make sure you do not open it, turn off the preview pane in your email program. I've said this a lot before, but your preview pane automatically opens the message. TURN IT OFF!!! In Outlook Express Click on View-->Layout and uncheck Preview Pane.

If you've already been infected, Symantec has good information in what to do to disinfect you system. You can find that response here:
Symantec Security Response - W32.Novarg.A@mm

UPDATE: Panda has a very thorough and user-friendly site for how to figure out if you are infected and how to get rid of it if you are. Go Here for more details:
Panda Software - Virus Info

Friday, January 23, 2004

Links, We don't need no stinkin links

I'm sitting at my computer this morning, doing my sweeps thing, when it dawned on me that it's Friday. It also occured to me that I have not spewed forth any links for a couple weeks now. I know you are all a patient lot, but I can not afford to neglect your needs any longer. I can smell the revolt, and it don't smell good. So, without further ado, here are your drugs links.

I'll start off this week with a true piece of sophisticated humour. Yes, it's so sophisticated that humour is spelled with a u.
Top Shelf Humour

Ok, I know, that was rather annoying. Feel like taking out your aggressions on that thing? Then you've come to the right place. However, I don't suggest this one to all of you true cat lovers out there (It's almost too much for me).
Clay Kitten Shooting II / Game

Here's a little message that I found over at Buzz's Site that just may explain a few things about men that will hopefully bridge the gap between the two sexes:

What week would be complete without a reference to the king of plop? Check out this flash game.
Escape From Neverland

Are you stumped for a gift idea for Aunt so-and-so or cousin whats-his-name? Maybe your looking for that perfect wedding gift for the couple who's registry has already been pillaged of all the good gifts. Well, don't say I never gave you nothing, because this little gift is perfect for any occassion:
Things You Never Knew Existed : Product Details [Shocking Roulette Game]

I don't really know what else to say about the drum flash bit besides...Wow!!
Drums Audio

For those of you who are just plain sick and tire of the commercialization of miniature golf, we have a course for you. So put on your rubber boots and sterilized gloves and grab your bottle of bactine kids, cuz its time to play putt-putt:
Miniature Golf Course

Are you sick and tired of how long the security lines have gotten in airports these days. Yeah, I here ya complaining out there. Well, let's just see how well you do then shall we?

Airport security

Wait a minute, I think there was a serious message behind that last game. Your thinking, I don't click on these links to think. Ok, here's an addictive game that I guarantee has no hidden agenda, besides maybe sucking all the productivity out of your day.
The ESP Game: Labeling the Web

Ok, your now thinking to yourself, "Sure, no agendas, but I still had to think, like, way too much". So, I will end this week's links with a multitude of goodies guaranteed not to make you think, wait, what was I doing?
b3ta newsletter presents: cursor love bunny | Donkey Kong Jr. | Funderstanding Roller Coaster | Speed | Twiddlestix - Miniclip.com

Well, that's all I got, hope you enjoy your weekend.

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Wednesday, January 21, 2004

Make the madness end

The guys at UF just don't know when to quit with this week's badger theme, but come to think of it, neither do I.

Click to make much gooder:

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More Humor

While I'm still preoccupied taking care of my now two addictions, I will try to keep you entertained by ripping someone else off:

You know you are living in the year 2004 when:

A. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is because they do not have e-mail.

B. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.

C. Your grandmother asks you to send her a JPEG file of your newborn so she can create a screen saver.

D. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home.

E. Every commercial on television has a web site address at the bottom of the screen.

F You buy a computer and 3 months later it's out of date and sells for half the price you paid.

G. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go get it.

H. Using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase would be a hassle and take planning.

I. You just tried to enter your password on the microwave.

J. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.

K. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.

L. Your idea of being organized is multiple-colored Post-it notes.

M. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.

N. You get an extra phone line so you can get phone calls.

O. You disconnect from the Internet and get this awful feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

P. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.

Q. You wake up at 2 AM to go to the bathroom and check your e-mail on your way back to bed.

R. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)

Found here: Buzzstuff: 2004


Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:

You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes to big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact come off during the course of you date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "Barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five:
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is: "early"

Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to introduce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka -- zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine:

Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless God of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun. a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveways you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car -- there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

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Tuesday, January 20, 2004

How'd that song go?

This one's for all my link fans out there. I'm sure you'll appreciate today's User Friendly Cartoon:

(Click to see gooder)

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Leland Snow Park

I know there's been a lack of entries recently, but don't blame me for not keeping this site updated. Blame this. Our friends who earlier won the fajita party and the trip to the Sugar bowl, won again, so I had to double my efforts. I still haven't been chosen as a wiener, but I am looking to ratify the situation shortly.

On Sunday, we all headed up to Leland Snow Park for some sled riding and fun in the snow. Turned out to be a beautiful day and fun was had by all. I got the pics up, without comments and descriptions though, due to my addiction I just told you about. Either way, I hope you enjoy the pics as much as we enjoyed posing for them.

Monday, January 19, 2004

History's Worst Typo

A new young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to help the other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand. He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from the original manuscript.

So, the new monk goes to the head abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up. In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.

The head monk, says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son."

So, he goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the original manuscript is held as archives in a locked vault that hasn't been opened for hundreds of years.

Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot. So, the young monk gets worried and goes downstairs to look for him.

He sees him banging his head against the wall, and wailing "We forgot the "R", We forgot the "R" His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying uncontrollably.

The young monk asks the old abbot, "What's wrong, father?"

With a choking voice, the old abbot replies, "The word is celebrate." "The word is celebRate."

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Saturday, January 17, 2004

What you talking 'bout Spam

I don't know if anyone else has noticed, but there have been some very strange subject lines in my inbox lately. Here's what I woke up to this morning:
  • petroleum caprice haitian metallurgy acclimate

  • doorkeep freddie habitat eight

  • Grace Domicile: Basis Point Process

  • All you hard downloads today

  • Re: EHBROT, was covered with

This is just a small list of the one's I've been receiving lately. I've started to wonder if all Spammers are using the same random subject generation software. It appears that at least some of them are.

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Wednesday, January 14, 2004

Top 17 Bumper Stickers

No time for posting lately, too busy at work. Got this little tidbit via e-mail though that I wanted to pass along.

Top 17 Bumper Stickers You Would Like To See

Jesus loves you...but everyone else thinks you are an ass.

Impotence...Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings,"

The proctologist called...they found your head.

Everyone has a photographic memory...some just don't have any film.

Save your breath...You'll need it to blow up your date.

Your ridiculous little opinion has been noted.

I used to have a handle on life...but it broke off.

WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.

Guys...just because you have one, doesn't mean you have to be one.

Some people just don't know how to drive...I call these people "Everybody But Me,"

Heart Attacks...God's revenge for eating His animal friends.

Don't like my driving? Then quit watching me.

If you can read this...I can slam on my brakes and sue you.

Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

Try not to let your mind wander...It is too small and fragile to be out by itself.

Hang up and drive!!

And The Number One Bumper Sticker you'd Like To See!!

Welcome to America...now speak English

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Thursday, January 08, 2004


Can you say addiction?? Or how about obsession??

Recently a couple friends of ours invited us into their home for a Baja Fresh Fajita party that they had won. As it turns out, they had also won a trip to the BCS Championship game in New Orleans. While they were there, they talked to the grand prize winner of that contest, they were the 1st prize winners, and he told them he entered some 200 sweeps a day using Online-Sweepstakes.com. So, now I'm officially hooked. C'mon, daddy needs a new trip to the Carribean...

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Tuesday, January 06, 2004

Of all the Mikes

A quick check of Google confirmed what my Site Meter told me this morning. Of the billions of Mikes in all the world, I am the 30th most popular, at least according to Google's search engine that is.

Google Search: Mike

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It's not a hair color

My wife tells me that blonde is not a hair color, it's a state of mind. I think I explicitly proved that point yesterday afternoon. For the past 18 months I have been attending night classes at the junior college nearest to where I work. It happens to be in the opposite direction of my home, so when classes start at 5:30, I usually just stay at work until it's time for class. Last night being the first night of class for the Spring semester, I went back to my routine of doing so. Or at least I thought it was the first night back to school.

As I pulled into one of the school's parking lots, I found the lack of cars rather strange. Sure there was a few, but normally during the first week of the semester, the parking lots resemble urban warfare with everyone trying to get a spot. The fact that there was only a handful of cars puzzled me greatly, but it didn't deter me from thinking that yesterday was the first day of school.

I then walked into the main hall to the business office so that I could pick up my parking pass for the semester. It was closed. Yet still I walked to my classroom and waited at the locked door for class. Not until it was 5 minutes past start time for that class, did I walk back to the main hall and start reading the posted signs.

And yes, class starts January 12th. It is definately a state of mind.

Monday, January 05, 2004

Taking it down

Taking down Christmas lights is always depressing. It means that the holiday season is over, plus it's a lot of work. Maybe it wouldn't take so long if I wasn't absolutely anal about the way each strand of lights is wrapped before putting them away for the year, but if I wasn't, setting up would be three times as difficult the next year. So the majority of my day yesterday was spent wrapping christmas lights.

I did get a chance to go out to the RC airstrip with my brother-in-law Bobby and get some footage of him flying. He's only been begging me to go out there for the past couple months or so. He's leaving for training on Tuesday though, so this was our last chance for awhile to do this. Last night he reviewed the footage I got, almost a full 30 minutes of it, and put together this clip. It's good stuff, some of my best video, and Bobby's best flying, to date.

The full day yesterday, coupled with the full day on Saturday's snow trip, will wear a person out, though. I was reading to Breanna last night, but I kept falling asleep while reading. That's no big deal, I've done that before. What was a first for me was continuing to read, or at least think I was reading, while sleeping. Every once in awhile, Breanna would repeat after me something that just didn't sound right. Example, the book read that Tigger bounced away down the path, but I read it to be Tigger bounced away to street number 4. So while dozing off I heard Breanna repeat "street number 4", look up and realize that my eyes were closed. This happened about three times, funny but mostly reminding me of something I've done that was even funnier.

While Marcy and I were in Reno last year, I was sick. It was when I was fighting my Bronchitis and I wouldn't have went if I wasn't in a slot tournament. Anyway, one day I decided that I was feeling better so I started drinking while playing Pai Gow all day long. That night I was feeling even worse and added Tylenol Sinus PM to the alcohol I had been drinking. Needless to say I was knocked out, but not before watching Alias. After the show, Marcy headed downstairs to make sure she wasn't called for the "Whirlwind of Cash" and gambled a little bit before coming back upstairs. When she did come back up, she felt my forehead because I looked like I was burning up. She wasn't expecting what happened next at all.

As soon as her hand touched my forehead my eyes opened up wider than she has ever seen them open up and I began to look around. I looked from Marcy, to the clock, to her purse, and back to her again. I asked "Did you get the backup?" Marcy replied in a very shocked voice, "What?". Again I looked from her, to the clock, and to her purse and asked again, "Did you get the backup?" At this point she asked me what I was talking about to which I pointed at her purse and asked "Is that the backup for the mission." When Marcy looked at me, dumbfounded, and asked me what I was talking about, I said "Nevermind", rolled over and went back to sleep.

Since that incident, I have been disallowed from mixing OTC medications and alcohol which I can see may not be such a good combination. Thankfully, I'm still allowed to watch Alias.

Sunday, January 04, 2004

Good, but oh so bad

Yesterday was not a good day for resolutions. But we did have a lot fun in the snow!! Most times, however, when resolutions are broken, they stay broken. Not this time. I'm making a January 4th day resolution to go back to my New Year's resolutions. How bout that?

Saturday, January 03, 2004

It's Saturday, why can't I sleep in?

It's 5:00 AM on Saturday, so why the hell am I awake? I'll tell you why, as soon as I finish skinning my cat. I'm kidding, you see I can't blame her even if I wanted to. We have an alarm clock that has two alarms on it, one always being set at 5 AM for me to get ready for work. Last night, while setting the second alarm so we could get up and head out to the snow, I accidentally set my own alarm as well. That should not have been a problem, though, turn it off and get back to sleep right? Not with Nala around. Once the alarm goes off, Nala knows that I need to get up, so what does she do to ensure that I will get up? She scratches our bed. And if I just let her out our bedroom door and go back to sleep? The couch gets it. She knows that will bring me downstairs in a heartbeat. I haven't yet figured out, though, whether she's being selfish because she wants something, food, bathroom outside, or if the cat truely knows that I have to get up and going at that time. If I ever figure it out, I'll let you know.

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Friday, January 02, 2004

Another Resolution

This is a tremedous idea. Discovery Health is giving everyone who takes their Discovery Health :: National Body Challenge free guest membership to Bally Total Fitness, and a free fitness and diet journal. Not only are they challenging us to get on that diet, but their going to help us out along the way. Who doesn't make a resolution to get healthier every year? How many times have you actually stuck to it? I know I haven't. I'm very impressed that Discovery Health is actually giving away as much as they are in the process. Am I going to get weighed in on the 10th? You betcha...

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Linkin in the New Year

In case you didn't notice, have been hiding under a rock, or have been in an alcohol induced coma for the last couple of days, the latter being entirely possible, it's 2004. That means it's time for us to make resolutions we don't plan on sticking to. My New Year's resolution is to not torment you the reader any further by posting those attrocious links that I have gotten into the habit of doing almost every Friday. I swear, you will from this day forth be link-free.

Ok, someone call the Guiness book of World Records and tell me what the record for quickest broken resolution is because here comes the links. They've been overflowing my bookmarks, waiting for my moment of weakness to get out, and here they are:

This weekend we will be taking down our Christmas lights and decorations and in doing so, the realization that Christmas is over truely sets in. We can do something about that though. Through these links, we can prolong the Christmas season in spirit:
::: SANTA SAYS ::: | Comet Christmas Game | Sober Santa | Merry Christmas from Rocket

Now that I've got you in the right spirit, I can break this news to you....My Cat Hates You:
My Cat Hates You

With the New Year upon us, I figured it might be good to be prepared, you know just in case the boss walks in this afternoon and tells me to clear out my desk. I don't think that will happen, but if it should, and I need to start looking for employment, I'm glad I have this updated:
Rejection Letter

As it turns out, my cat is not the only one who hates you, so do....ummm....they:
Donuts Hate You

Since we're all in such a good mood, let's talk about those call center technicians. The kind, courteous, if only you understood what language there were speaking. Anyway, here's a little link that might bring all of us a little closer to understanding...the call center technician.

Call Center Charlie

Ooops, I think I got a little off track wanting to keep everyone thinking of Christmas so let's finish off this week with this one here:
Penguin Shuffle

So much for resolutions huh, hopefully I'll keep to my not smoking resolution just a tad longer than that one lasted. So far, so good. Until next week then.

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Bring on the New Year

Wow, look at that, it's 2004. Another new year has started, and with it another resolution to stop smoking. I know many of you didn't even know I had started again, but Me and Marcy both slipped with all the parties of the holiday season. So we set our date of January 1st, again, dusted off the nicotrol inhalers, and are getting ready for the ride that is quitting smoking. Maybe it won't be that bad since it had been almost four months of not smoking before we slipped, but then again...this is the most addictive drug known to man we are talking about.

We're already on day two, but then again, yesterday was spent in jammies all day long, falling asleep on the couch, pretending to watch TV, so you could call this day one. The very thought of a cigarette made me sick to my stomach. I smoked enough of them New Year's Eve to last me a lifetime, though. I also drank enough Captain and Cokes to last me the rest of the year, but that's a whole different topic. We did hold our annual tradition of greeting New Year's Day with a slur, I mean in a blur, ok, I guess both of them apply. Fun was definately had by all and an ungodly amount of alcohol was consumed, but most importantly, all were there to enjoy pancakes made for us by my Mother-In-Law on New Year's Day. Here's hoping that the new year will see us and all of our friends as safe and as sound as New Year's Day did, maybe with a little less of a hangover, though.

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